Season 6: Where Legends Were Born and Chimneys Died
* This countdown is an estimate and may not be accurate to the second.
The Philosopher King (PhD in Vibeology)
"poo poo kaka pee pee (in the mario underworld theme)"
The iPad Warrior
"Riot it's a gadget" *autocorrect has entered the chat*
The Streamer Gremlin
"fuck grandmas chimney"
The Architect
"Built different, literally built this server"
The Wholesome Warrior
"Your mom was giving me a good ol reach around"
The Bigfoot of Gaming
"KENNY WHO WANTS TO FUCKKKKKKK"
Ghost Pepper Survivor
"True true 👍"
Nobody recovers. Discord scholars still studying the transcripts. Nietzsche mentioned 47 times.
Teddy becomes a legend and a liability. Toilet strat was born. The bathroom was never the same.
We all stare at the lobby screen in silence. Some say we're still waiting. "Life is lifing."
Chaos and laughter erupt. 47 pages of pure unhinged gameplay philosophy. FBI still investigating.
foRpLe declares it "not just a weapon, it's a lifestyle." Stock prices soar. Reality questioned.
Server chants "Kenneth" over 50 times. Becomes our national anthem. We lost count after "kennesy whiskey."
lostboykaleido's crew holds 4 cashout boxes in ONE game. Pure mob boss energy. Embark sweating.
colonelshaggy runs Finals on an iPad. "Because why not?" Wins a round. Steve Jobs smiling from heaven.
A cry for help. May not involve men. Or need. Or grammar. Often screamed into the void at 3am.
High risk. Low movement. Maximum reflection. Born from the Ghost Pepper Incident. Teddy's legacy.
What happens when you say "hi" and someone giggles instead of shooting. 60% success rate in proximity chat.
The belief that using an off-meta weapon makes you morally superior. See also: CHYNA RAKE enthusiasts.
Verb, noun, adjective, lifestyle. Universal answer to any question. "You Kenny?" "Kenneth." "Ken."
Hawaiian for existing somewhere. Mainland translation: ??? colonelshaggy's gift to confused linguistics.
"Wait... I'm on mute? I've been monologuing for 9 minutes about my divorce."
"I don't need healing, I need closure... and maybe a therapist."
"What if we just... didn't shoot, and won through diplomacy? Geneva Convention speedrun."
"CHYNA RAKE isn't just a weapon, it's a lifestyle. I have it tattooed on my lower back."
"I wasn't AFK, I was manifesting our victory through stillness and strategic meditation."
"Riot it's a gadget" - colonelshaggy, betrayed by autocorrect
"fuck grandmas chimney" - lostboykaleido, post-patch rage
"Not as gassy as pintos, but way spicier" - momentum_1, bean philosopher
"gayest light sky blue" - foRpLe, expanding color theory
"kennesy whiskey" - The server's battle cry
The most philosophical debate about tactical equipment in gaming history.
"It's almost throwing away a slot"
"Got me to Emerald tho"
* This debate is still ongoing. Pick a side at your own risk.
foRpLe will get blue skins but discover they're actually teal
colonelshaggy will retire 47 more times (0 will stick)
lostboykaleido will make boats fly somehow
1-800-FAT-MOMS will create even more legendary content
FAT TEDDY's sapphire campaign continues
stepbroo will return when we need him most
Someone, somewhere, will need a third
Kenneth variations will exceed 5,000
Three soldiers. One burning barrel. Infinite Kenneth.